Practicing resiliency through change

Term 3 was challenging.  Sometimes I felt like I was going to combust.  I kept getting sick.  I was feeling anxious.  I felt like there was too much to do.  I couldn’t stop, I had to keep going.  I felt driven.  

I hadn’t meant to end up like this.  I never do.  But circumstances can’t always be controlled. Basically, I love change, but my body doesn’t always enjoy it.

Are you aware of those times you step outside your comfort zone, being brave, and in your head it is all okay, you know it will be, but your body doesn’t agree?  That is what happened.  

I have now moved to Christchurch, New Zealand and I am loving it.  But, it was uncomfortable to get to this place.  For the last 5 and a half years I have lived at Te Karaka 20 minutes North of Gisborne, New Zealand.  It took a few years to feel comfortable but finally it was.  Everything was familiar.  Then I moved to Christchurch and everything became unfamiliar.  The buildings, the house, the food, the school, the staff, my family wasn’t with me (they arrive in one weeks time).  Driving to Christchurch I worked really hard to control my anxiety.  

I now have a home, with my own pictures on the wall.  I can drive to school without using Mr Google Maps.  I know the names of all my new colleagues.  I know the timetable.  It is amazing how anxiety lessons when patterns start to form.

Why am I sharing this?  Because we need change in Education.  There is a huge equity gap and it is most noticeable for learners who are Maori and Pacifica, for our learners with Diverse Needs, for those in poverty and for those learners who just don’t fit into the factory model of school.  In order to move Education from Factory Models of producing students who are similar, and leave school with a closed mindset, re-producing knowledge, to a future focused model of learners who are able to think for themselves producing new information, we are going to have to change. Teachers will have to experience change, students will have to change, schools will have to change, education systems will have to change.  And I don’t think we can change without getting uncomfortable.  

Change is not always pleasant, even if we think it is the right thing to do. Change often requires us to be in a space where things are unfamiliar.  The positives of being in an unfamiliar space is that we notice new things.  We are more open than usual.  We met new people and might have more opportunities. If we take opportunity during this change through reflecting we can become innovative, we can change our selves by noticing things we hadn't seen before.  Blindspots become visible.  During my move to Christchurch I had to dig deep and pull out some dispositions that I hadn’t used for a while.  I am reminded of one from my previous school Te Karaka Area School.  Stickability!  The ability to keep going even when it is tough. We used to say out loud “I can do it! I won’t give up!" At my new school, we call this Resiliency.  Never giving up, persevering with new knowledge and skills.  

I have practiced resiliency before in my life, but I had forgotten what it felt like to actually have to use it.  And it was tough.  I don’t think it was any easier.  I had to work my mind, reminding myself where I was going.  I depended on my friends who said “You will be okay, keep going”.  I practiced mindfulness through deep breathing.  I prayed and spent time where I could in the quiet. Thinking about the future and where I was going and why also helped greatly.  I had to influence my heart!

The same can be said for changing pedagogy.  Changing the way we teach to something we are not familiar with is scary.  All our patterns are disrupted.  However, isn’t this what learning should be?  Can you learn without changing?  Yes, you can learn something in your head and not have it affect your heart, but isn’t real learning about changing the head and the heart?  

And what of our learners?  How often do they feel change?  You know I was in charge of my change from Gisborne to Christchurch, and I was tested. But for many of our learners they are not in charge of change.  They have to learn this or that.  They have to do what the teacher tells them.  They have to study this topic.  Wouldn’t it be aspirational to believe that each learner could influence their own learning and by doing so have opportunity to practice resiliency in a safe to fail way.